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Thinking About Moving In Together Before Marriage?

Thinking About Moving In Together Before Marriage?

Here are 10 things to seriously consider before officially moving in together

Moving in with your partner is a big step. There sure are some amazing perks that accompany this leap but every good thing comes with a cost. Do you really want to make a hasty decision and risk this beautiful relationship that you’re building? Because if things go south, you might have to part ways. When it comes to decisions like this, weighing the pros and cons and analyzing whether the cost is worth what you’re taking away is essential. To make this decision easy for you, here are 10 things to consider before you decide to move in together!

1.      Observe whether it’s the right time

There are times when all the exciting feelings that one experiences during the initial phases of a relationship cloud the judgment. If you’re in that phase, I strongly suggest that you consider waiting it out. Don’t rush into this because if it’s not the right time, your relationship will take a blow. Take as much time you need, discuss it with your friends and do everything you need to do to make sure the both of you are completely ready to move in.

2.      Have you discussed ground rules?

When two completely grown human beings are contemplating sharing a space, you must have ground rules. If you don’t like pets and your partner wants to get one, where can you meet halfway? If you’re an extrovert while your partner is an introvert, maybe having friends over every other night isn’t a good idea. Such discussions are vital so that both of you are aware of the boundaries and disagreements to work through such issues.

3.      Finance Splitting

When you live together, there are shared expenses. Finance is a complex topic which is why the best thing one can do is get a system sorted that works for both of you before moving in.

4.      The Chores

Yup, chores are another vital part of your life. After moving in, you may realize that on dates, your partner is this active ball of energy that is full of life but at home, he/she is a princess who needs 24-hours of babysitting. Well, you don’t want to have to deal with this after you move in. So, talk about this beforehand to avoid any awkward situation later on.   

5.      Are both of you on the same page?

If moving in is on the cards, there might be an implied understanding that you know what your partner wants. Talking about what this step means to you and your partner is important because the more your values and expectations are aligned, the better it is for your future together. Sit down and talk about the value living together holds in each of your lives.

6.      Giving each other space

You don’t want someone hovering over you at all times and or the other way around. Before you move in, discuss the comfort level and the importance of alone time. Both parties involved should understand the other person in this matter otherwise, living together with conflict in this area might result in frustration and futile arguments.

7.      Be prepared for the rough patches

Moving in means sharing happiness, peace, and joy but it also means working through the bad and the ugly. Coming home to your lover after a long day is what each of us craves but when you’re living together, somedays you will be coming home to arguments and unresolved fights. Be prepared for unforeseen problems because they are inevitable if you move in. But if your bond is strong, you will work through it.

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8.      The concept of shared emotions

When you’re committing to living with someone, you’re not just signing up for their presence but also sharing the emotions that are felt. This means, that creating a space where both of you can unwind and be at peace together is your and your partner’s responsibility. You cannot be selfish or be self-absorbed because your partner will be affected too and vice versa.

9.      The location

Moving in together means merging the lives of two individuals. Getting a place that is suitable for both your routines and lifestyle is important. Don’t rush, have a few options, decide on a budget and select a place when you both feel happy with it. This is a huge commitment, think it through.

10. Pay attention to your partner’s habits

Remember that living with your partner isn’t the same as spending a couple of nights a month with them. Before committing to this, take off the veil of love that’s covering your senses and judge them. Yes, I mean it – judge them. Notice how they keep their apartment, how clean their refrigerator is, do they do their laundry regularly, etc. If after this evaluation and all of the other aspects covered in this article, you feel good about moving in – go ahead and move in!  

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