Get out of this abusive relationship quick
Things just don’t feel right deep down in your heart. You know that this is not how a healthy relationship should be, yet there doesn’t seem to be an easy way out. Or you aren’t even sure if this is an abusive relationship at all. Being in an abusive relationship is harmful to you, both physically and mentally.
Some can’t tell whether their relationship is abusive or not, yet, most know it when they are in a relationship they shouldn’t be. They just can’t figure out a way out. Check out all these unhealthy signs in an abusive relationship and see solutions for it.
1. Your partner makes you feel unworthy
“I’d definitely cheat if given the chance. That’s just human nature to go after better-looking people.” Even a statement like that is relationship abuse. Your partner should never let you feel unwanted or that you have to compete for their affection. They’re making you feel that they will leave for someone else the day you look less attractive to them. That’s a form of mental abuse.
2. Your partner blames you for everything
Blaming each other isn’t going to solve anything it only deepens the problem. Your partner may guilt you into believing everything’s your fault so that you would stay and amend it. That’s a form of relationship abuse. They make you believe it’s all your fault and you need to fix your mistakes. That’s how they get to make you stay. Staying in a relationship because of guilt is so unhealthy. It shouldn’t be this way and you certainly should consult a therapist when things are getting out of control.
3. Your partner hits you when upset
He might get physically violent when he is upset and hits you or pushes you. Often enough, they will apologize afterward, excusing themselves with reasons like they’re drunk or they’re just upset. Now, remember this, NEVER excuse someone that’s violent to you. Chances aren’t meant to be given like that. People that can get violent once, can do it again.
We get upset at our parents, friends, siblings and boyfriend at times. Granted, there may have been times we wanted to punch them in the face, but we wouldn’t because we aren’t a violent person by nature. If one day you get so upset that you indeed hit your parents, you already know deep down that you can do it again. Punching someone you care about takes a lot. Never trust someone that’s once violent to you. Either make them go through therapy until they’re more stable or you just need to leave for your own safety. NEVER hesitate to call the police if you’re ever fear for your life. The authorities can help you, but you have to let them. You have to let them know you need help.
4. He gets pushy when you don’t act according to his demands
Couples can’t always agree on the same issue. What matters the most is how you solve your differences. Say you want to do a road trip through the mid-West with your gal pal, he says he doesn’t want to be left alone all weekend and demand you to stay. He might even get pushy. Relationships are about understanding each other’s needs and wants. Demanding the other person to act according to what we want isn’t a civilized behavior we should have in this century.
5. He neglects you all the time and never puts forth your needs
Does he only reply when he feels like and then ignores you for the whole day even if he is free? Does he always do what he wants and never ask what you want or need? Someone that’s unavailable emotionally won’t be a good partner, even though they may be physically there. Relationship abuse doesn’t always have to be physical or verbal. Emotional emptiness is also a form of relationship abuse because you’re almost not even in a relationship. You’re just talking to someone that replies when they feel like, not because they feel they should talk to you since you’re in a committed relationship.
What should you do if you’re in an abusive relationship?
1. Talk your partner into getting professional help
Depends on how much you still want to save this relationship, or just save your partner as a person. Getting therapy is the best way for both to acknowledge there’s a problem. Therapy is good because you can ease things in with a third person. It’s never easy to tell your partner things aren’t going to work this way. Getting a second opinion can maintain the harmony in your relationship.
2. Be firm about your needs and don’t let him change you
Say it when something doesn’t feel right. Don’t do something out of fear. Doing something out of fear tells you you’re in a wrong relationship. You need to make your stance clear. You won’t be pushed around just like that. Either this relationship is equal or there won’t be a relationship. Be careful of who you’re talking to, if he is potentially violent, do it in a public area so you can always get help if things go wrong. Get a few friends with you as well if you’re afraid of his violent nature.
3. Please call the police of authorities if necessary
Do NOT attempt to reason with him or be alone with him if he is getting violent and you’re fear for your life. Don’t think you’re betraying your partner by calling for help. He will end up in prison anyway if he does anything to harm you. It’s better to stop him before he actually does something so the authorities can send him for professional help. Put your own safety first. You can’t help him if you can’t even help yourself.
Relationship abuse is a sad topic that is happening every minute as we speak. Some struggle to get out of one even if they want to. Talk to your trusted friends and family member if you’re in an abusive relationship and don’t know what to do. Always remember that a relationship that brings you down isn’t even a relationship, that’s just abuse.