Keeping long distance relationships alive
Modern day technology has made it possible to stay in touch with someone almost 24/7. However, people still believe that long distance relationships are doomed to never work out. Your friends may advise you not to go for it cause “your heart will be broken”.
No one says it will be easy, the extra distance will make things seem impossible. Situations can get complicated or you might feel sad or lonely at times. However, the extra distance will also make the simplest things, the sweetest and most beautiful in a sense such as being able to hold the other person’s hand, eating together, taking a walk together, and embracing each other after waiting for so long.
Long distance relationships can be tough but they also hold their own surprises. To keep your relationship alive and strong, here are 10 tips to keep the love going:
1. Stick to a Schedule
Timing matters, especially when the time you spend together in the day is limited and precious. Different work or school schedules, sleep time, and time zones can all create chaos when it comes to making time to be in each other’s company. Settling into a pattern will be hard at first but it will normalize with time. There’s no limit to making different communication arrangements, such as which part of the day you can talk or when you want to be on your own, as long as both of you are mutually satisfied. Set a time that works for both of you and make an effort to always stick to the schedule.
2. Set an End Game
The key to staying hopeful in a long distance relationship is looking forward to the time that you guys will meet. It helps ease both parties to know when that would happen. It is easier to keep yourself motivated to the end goal and work together through the struggles of being apart. Being apart is hard and after all the waiting and yearning, finally meeting each other and being together will give you the strength to hold on.
3. Keep a Piece of Them
Texting and video calls are a blessing in this day and age and staying in touch with someone has never been easier. But don’t forget the power of having something that reminds you of your partner. Keeping any belonging around that would smell like your partner, having a token that serves as a symbol of your commitment with your partner, or having a gift display prominently serves as a reminder of the love the both of you share.
4. Everything is a Conversation Topic
Communication is key in any relationship but in long distance relationships, even the most boring details of your life matters. It is easy to grow apart if you have no idea what the daily routine of your partner’s life is. Don’t make the mistake of letting yourself be a mystery. Of course, no one wants to listen to nothing but a list of minutiae, but the key is staying in each other’s lives enough that you have a feel for everything and everyone that make up the context of their lifestyle.
5. Make Fun Plans
Delight yourselves in the details of what the two of you would do when you two will finally see each other. Plan your exciting trips together. Make it a habit to talk about the things you’ll do together. This will make the wait worth it and bearable.
6. Always trust your partner
Long-distance is already a challenge for lovers. Trust and communication are vital to get through it. You’re supposed to be the person your lover turns to, to get away from the chaos of the world. If you, yourself become the chaos by being doubtful and holding them accountable for every action that they take, your relationship will suffer. So trust your partner and by that I don’t mean to ignore all the red flags.
7. Be an Optimist
Try to steer away from the thought of how unlucky you both are to not live close to each other and focus on being in each other’s lives will help you both grow stronger. Think of how special you are that your partner will chose you with the distance every day over the guys/girls near them. Look at the beauty of the strong bond that you’re both fighting for. Be an optimist.
8. Be Confident in Your Relationship
Insecurity is one of the biggest enemies a person will ever face and it will coerce one to check up on the other person far too often. This can lead to excessive calls and texts being sent for the wrong reasons and causing what is known as negative attention. When the communication is hijacked by insecurity and anxiety, the partner will not be reassured and will be turned off by the constant attention. Try to keep the communication healthy because being clingy is cancer to any relationship.
9. Don’t Halt Yourself
Long distance relationships require a lot of sacrifice, no doubt about that, but it’s important not to halt your own progress in life because of it. This often leads to breed resentment and having regrets over time which will cause turmoil within the relationship. It’s one thing to look forward to finally being together and another to postpone things that make up your own individual life. Live each day fully whether your partner is absent or not, making sure that you are doing your best to make the most of your life.
10. Don’t Over-plan Your Time in Person
Once you two are apart, being back together actually makes one feel like there is no time to waste. While this can lead to having a jam-packed pre-planned schedule for when you meet, it can also be a double-edged sword. I’m suggesting to plan but not over plan. You need to have time to just be in each other’s company and go with the flow.
While technology is a blessing but if you ask anyone who’s been in a long distance relationship; technology cannot make up for everything, it’s just a medium. It seems like because of how easy it is to communicate, long distance is not difficult but that’s not the case. Even though it has become way easier than it was, conscious effort from both sides is still vital to keep things spiced up between the both of you. Stay strong long-distance lovers! Love is worth it.